Walk With Me.

I am down deep in the trenches. The trenches of grief. 

Losing my child is a grief like no other, creating world that most people can not relate to, and making it a journey that is challenging to support.

It’s life-long journey – a membership I can’t relinquish. There is no way out this side of Heaven – I just have to go through it.

I’ve learned that it’s difficult for those around me to know what to do or what to say? Wondering if I need space – or I want to be alone? An uncertainty of what is too much or too little? It’s often a feeling of helplessness. These varied uncertainties sometimes cause people to shy away. While I’m desperately holding on, others are desperately wondering … how much, when and what?

All I need is for you to walk with me.

I live with the ever-changing, ever-evolving range of emotions. The waves of pain can come fiercely crashing in and pull me under without warning.  Other times it’s a slow build followed by a fall that hits hard.  My heart is filled with a constant ache – a burning ache – raw to the core.  And feelings of sadness are always stirring on the inside even when not visible on the outside.  All of this (and more) has created an unfillable emptiness within my soul. Leaving my emotional world … full of uncertainties too.

Just walk with me.

Truth is…this world we live in is overflowing with many unknowns and uncertainties. There are no promises or guarantees in life this side of Heaven. But, we do have a Savior and His word offers hope for the trials we face, and the Answer to our suffering. God has given us each a way through, a way out of this ever-changing life we each face. I imagine He is also saying…

Walk With Me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kBLkbBEfjcc

May the lyrics to this song give you a little peek into the aches and needs of my heart. More importantly, the true meaning behind these lyrics is about the One who walks with each of us through every trial. I pray you can hold on to the promise that He’s always near and let Him carry you.

You walked with me, footprints in the sand
And helped me understand where I’m going
You walked with me when I was all alone
With so much unknown along the way
Then I heard you say

I promise you, I’m always there
When your heart is filled with sorrow and despair
Ill carry you when you need a friend
You’ll find my footprints in the sand

I see my life flash across the sky
So many times have I been so afraid
And just when I have thought I lost my way
You give me strength to carry on
That’s when I heard you say

I promise you, I’m always there
When your heart is filled with sorrow and despair
And Ill carry you when you need a friend
You’ll find my footprints in the sand

When I’m weary, well, I know you’ll be there
And I can feel you when you say

I promise you, I’m always there
When your heart is filled with sadness and despair
Ill carry you when you need a friend
You’ll find my footprints in the sand

I promise you, I’m always there
When your heart is full of sadness and despair
Ill carry you when you need a friend
You’ll find my footprints in the sand

To those who are walking with me I am so incredibly grateful. And to the ones who have tried and are feeling unsure, please be patient  – and be patient with me. In my world of uncertainties it’s difficult to absorb my ever-changing emotions. Your offer … may be just what I need tomorrow ~ xoxo

Precious Savior, This life is filled with suffering and hearts are cracked wide open with pain. You graciously offer a Way and say “Walk With Me”.  As the weight of the world presses down hard, I am grateful You are always near to carry the sorrow and despair. ~ Amen